Nanette CortezLingering Offenses, Who’s Offended?
When you read this question did you think to yourself, I’m good, I’m not upset with anyone. I’m not holding anything against anyone, I have no lingering offenses.
Let me ask you, has there been a time when someone sincerely came to you and apologized? You responded to them, I forgive you. Or maybe they haven’t come to you to apologize, but you went to the Lord and said, “I forgive them and I forgive them for all the things they have done to me.” My question is, did you REALLY forgive them? Is there a little bit of bitterness you are still holding down deep inside?
I’m bringing this up because lingering offenses, bitterness, or unforgiveness in any capacity can start to destroy you. I heard someone once say it like this. Betrayal is what people do to you, but bitterness is what you do to yourself.
Bitterness stills our joy, it keeps us from being happy and enjoying everyday life. It is like this weight that holds us down and makes us feel ick. Without realizing it, we might find ourselves complaining often. Instead of having an attitude of being grateful, we instead complain about everything around us. You find yourself more angry about things, or easily irritated. Bitterness can cause depression and anxiety.
How To Do A Self-Check
So let’s do a check to see if we really have forgiven that person, or if we still have lingering offenses. If not, let’s clean it out of us.
- How do you feel when someone speaks well of that person? Do you feel irked inside? Does a mad look come across your face? Does a little bit of jealousy come up? Or do you feel happy about that person?
- Does your skin crawl when you hear something good happened to them?
- Do you turn and go in a different direction when you see that person coming?
If you have truly forgiven them, when you think of them, it doesn’t bother you or cause that hurt inside of you. At this point we say I have to get rid of this because I don’t like what this bitterness, this offense that I’m holding onto is doing to me. How it’s affecting my daily life. I desire to be free!
Sometimes it takes a step of faith. Going to the Lord and saying, Lord by faith I CHOOSE to forgive them. I ask you Lord to help me in the areas I have been holding bitterness to release it. Lord cleanse me from all the hurt, bitterness, everything that I have held inside me about that person. Do a soul cleansing. Release it all out of you.
The Lord forgave us for all our sins. When He forgives us, he trusts us that we are not going to do it anymore. In fact in Jeremiah 31:34 it says “I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more” God doesn’t just forgive. He chooses not to remember. Why? Because he trusts us not to do it again. When God forgives he forgives wholeheartedly. Psalms 103:12 says “as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.”
Not only is that good news for us but think about it. By Him forgiving us, that keeps Him from having bitterness. If the Almighty God forgives and it’s that important to him, how much more is it that we forgive also?
We can’t change what has happened in the past. But we can change what happens from this moment forward. If someone has come to you and asked for forgiveness. When you forgive, you forgive. Trust that they will never do that thing again. Truly forgive them. Get rid of the bitterness and enjoy life.
If you would like to dig a little deeper about how Offense can affect your life, this blog by Rick Renner is worth the read. https://renner.org/article/the-solution-to-offense/
To learn more about how important your thoughts determines how your relationships are, check out this blog.
Your Mindset Determines Your Friends
